I recently finished co-facilitating a round of Bodies & Trauma therapy group and I wanted to share some information on what trauma is, how it impacts us, and how we can heal. The value of community and connection keeps coming up in different spaces and conversations I’m in. I've learned, and experienced first hand, that community is key to our wellbeing.
Reflection Prompt: How do you (or can you) engage in community?
Trauma happens when we experience things that feel like too much, too soon, too fast, or for too long.
Trauma wears many different faces. It doesn't always look like this one big event that happened once in our lives. Trauma can be something experienced over a period of time, and it can be anything that happens when we don't have the support or resources needed to navigate the situation. Something that may be traumatic to one person, may not be traumatic to another person who has access to needed support.
Trauma reduces our capacity or tolerance for connection, while increasing our need for it.
When trauma is present, our brains go into a survival mode (it try's to figure out how to get us to safety and/or protect against further trauma). Our automatic nervous systems takes over and the conscious part of ourselves used to relate to others and engage with the world (the exploratory, open, and curious part) goes offline. Anything that can threaten the sense of safety or trigger feelings even remotely similar to traumatic experience, are shut out.
We can address trauma by intentionally working to form deeper connections to ourselves and the world around us.
We can counteract the impact of trauma by beginning to re-engage with those systems that went off line. When we increase our awareness of trauma responses, we can determine moments of activation (understand triggers and identify ways to regulate our emotions).
Reflection prompt: What does it feel like in my body when I am activated? What does it feel like when I am calm? Are there any particular sensations that I notice?
When we form meaningful connections and relationships we are actively engaged in our healing process.
A lot of healing involves changing the narrative about what we believe. Because trauma occurs in moments where are needs are not met (needs for safety, security, reassurance, love, etc.), we may have formed beliefs centered around the ideas like:
I have to do everything on my own.
There's no one who can help me.
What I feel isn't important.
Cultural norms around individualism can also keep us tied to these harmful beliefs and stuck in our healing process. When we form meaningful connection and relationships (spend time in places and with people where we can be affirmed, seen, felt, and held), we can find evidence that goes against the harmful beliefs we created to survive. And we can form new, more supportive beliefs:
After receiving help I am energized.
I know someone who will listen to me.
There are resources and supports available to me.
Community is a catalyst for healing. We thrive most when we are in healthy relationships and community with others.
Community has the power to create connection. Shared goals, value, and common interest rise to the surface when in community. Community creates opportunities to feel belonging, to feel seen, and to be supported in ways we may not have always had access to. The human experience is a relational one, where we have always made our greatest human strides when working together. Where trauma takes us off line, disengages our social engagement system, and disconnects us... community does the opposite. It brings those social systems online because it calls for engagement. Being in community can bring up an array of different feelings. For those who have experience trauma, community can feel uncomfortable or uneasy because it may asks us to shift how we have been operating for so long. But it can also be a necessary route towards tending to the wounds, healing, growing, and thriving.
Learn more about ways to engage in our community.
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